Postcard from Lesotho

So I was happy to find a humidifier here in Maseru as it has been SO dry/drying out my skin (pity pity me!).  When I took it out of the box, though, I discovered it had a “European plug” and so of course needs an adapter for my African outlet.  Luckily I had an extra, but it made me think – and not for the first time – wouldn’t you think electrical outlets would be something the world could sit down and agree on?  I mean, seriously, it just seems DUMB that every region/country has to have their own particular style/type of outlet.  C’mon people, it’s 2014!

So about a month after I started, we also got a new Director of Programming & Training (DPT).  Debra is fresh from DC and is also an RPCV (“Returned Peace Corps Volunteer” for those of you keeping track of all the Peace corps acronyms).  Now, granted, she arrived in country in the midst of Lesotho’s “political crisis” AND she is a woman living alone in a supposedly dangerous country, but it has been a bit….um, interesting to see just how “cautious” she was her first couple of weeks here.  I’m trying to be understanding, but the other day when she made it clear she STILL wasn’t comfortable walking to the mall by herself in the middle of the day – the mall that is literally around the corner/down the very busy street from our office – well, let’s just say it was hard for me to not be like, “Girl, please – you lived in DC!  You’d be more likely to get mugged there.  Will be interested to see how long it DOES take her to “let go” a little bit.

One of the downsides to living here: if I have a craving for, say, ice cream, at night, I can’t go get any.  One thing I will say America (and most Western, hell even Asian big cities) has that’s nice is that whole “convenience” thing.  Of course, I know that also leads to obesity, heart disease, and a demanding impatience, but still….ice cream!

We got a new group of trainees!  The latest Education group arrived awhile back – 33 of them – and it was actually very cool/exciting to go meet them at the airport, welcome them, etc.  See the mix of exhaustion, terror, and excitement on their faces.  Sigh.  It totally took me back.

Now, one of the GOOD things about living here is I can afford a maid.  And even have her come once a week (as opposed to about once a month in China – although, to be honest, I really could have afforded to have her come more often in China, but I was kind of cheap/saving my money).  The downside is, while this maid is very good at cleaning (I share her with the Country Director and the above mentioned DPT), she also hides all my shit.  I LIKE having my honey out on the table, honey, and NOT in the refrigerator.  I don’t WANT my popcorn and nuts in the cabinet – I want them on that one particular counter where I’ll see it and remember it.  She even decided my coat rack would be better off in my bedroom, rather than the entryway (to be fair, I was actually kind of happy about this, since, due to the layout of my house, I was often startling myself by coming across the coat rack and thinking it was an intruder).  Some stuff took me forever to find.  Apparently she does this with the CD and DPT, too.  So now I just embrace it and look forward to the “treasure hunt” after her weekly cleaning.  Well, look forward to it, until I can’t find something immediately that I want, then I rant and rave and stomp around the house, cursing her, until I figure out where my adapter/cell phone/salt/eye drop medicine is.  J  When I do that, I yell like this old woman from this book I recently read.  She sat at her window screeching at passers by in staccato sentences: “Hair too short!”  “Stupid pants!”  “Walk too slow!”  I say stuff like “Honey on table!”  “Sweet snacks on top shelf!”  Yes, apparently, I am turning into a crazy old lady.

Regular readers of my blog will be un-surprised to hear that I am “unimpressed” with the drivers here.  Clearly, no one in the world can drive as well as me.  But seriously, it’s a good thing there aren’t as many people here as in China, as the driving here is insanely reckless.  They drive at ridiculous speeds through residential areas and in general – except for the one-third of drivers who barely crawl along.  They pass with abandon – two lane/two way city streets, treacherously narrow mountain roads, you name it.  Red lights are merely a suggestion.  Seriously.  While many folks WILL stop for a red light, many others will simply stop, look around, and if it’s clear, sail right through.  Still others will simply blow right through it.  Needless to say, I’ve seen numerous accidents since I’ve been here, and already had two reported from staff while working (not their fault) since I’ve been here.  Four years ago, one of our drivers, in a run to the airport to pick up a staff person, tried to pass two cars on the way, but the one in front of the first one—a taxi—decided to just suddenly make a u-turn on the two-lane/two-way road and so the PC driver plowed right into said taxi, killing the driver.  Peace Corps had to give the taxi driver’s family a cow (seriously), and the driver is still in the process of being sued – but the courts here operate even more slowly than in America, so who knows if anything will ever come of it.

I found out the other day that the security guards stationed at my house are required to make a circuit of the perimeter of my yard every 15 minutes.  Apparently, there are little scan checkpoints scattered around the perimeter, which is how the security company knows the guys do it.  If they do it more often than every 15 minutes they get a bonus.  Between that, the wall, the razor wire on top of said wall, and the bars on all my windows and doors, you’d think I wouldn’t jump at night when the old house I’m in makes a sound, but I do.  Hmmm, maybe it’s because of the hyped up security?

In any case, I’m moving to a different house when I get back from DC.  Very excited to find a newer/nicer place just a few blocks from where I am now with a great view.  Two story, 3 bedroom, much smaller lot.  Nice master bedroom suite/master bathroom, multiple balconies and porches, very clean/white/modern looking.  Pics to come!

A Tale of Two Thanksgivings

So even though I’m 8,000 miles away from America, I got to celebrate Thanksgiving twice: once with over 50 Peace Corps Volunteers/soon-to-be-volunteers and once with over 50 Americans/misc. Westerners/ex-pats.

Wendy, the PC Country Director, graciously opened up her home and conveniently HUGE backyard so that the current crop of 33 Education trainees who are nearby wrapping up Pre-Service training could experience Thanksgiving.  As it turns out, our 13 semi-new “Healthy Youth” volunteers were also nearby for the “Phase III” part of their training, so they got to come along (this is the group whose swearing in I got to witness right after my arrival), And, finally, we had a handful of misc. other current PCVs who were in town for medical reasons, or were closing their service, etc.

Our concerns about the weather ended up being well-founded.  While it had been warm and dry the past several days, Thanksgiving day dawned cloudy with intermittent showers.  We pushed forward with two large tents set up in Wendy’s backyard, and the weather held long enough for us all to gather under one of them to do round-robin introductions and each share something we were thankful for.  Most of the volunteers said they were VERY thankful to have this opportunity to celebrate Thanksgiving, and to do so amongst such a large new “family.”  One was thankful he had not yet had diarrhea in country – such is the life of a PCV.  J

The weather held just about until everyone got their food – then it started POURING. Most of the folks stayed fairly dry under the tents, but all the woosy American staff (and local staff) – including me – stayed indoors. It was also fairly cold (at least for Lesotho in November).   I’m sure for some of the volunteers, the deluge just added to the experience. 

After dinner, Wendy’s husband and sons managed to get the Macy’s Parade on their TV and I played a few games I’d brought with some of the volunteers in the dining room—including a nice young married couple from Montana.  It was definitely cool to get to better know this group; I always get a kick out of talking to the volunteers, hearing their stories, etc.  And even though there was no stuffing, we DID have turkey, mashed potatoes, mac & cheese, green bean casserole, etc. AND cranberry sauce I’d brought along from Whole Foods right before I left DC (organic!), which many folks appreciated.

The following Sunday, I went with the 2 other PC U.S. staff (Wendy had left for a S. Africa camping trip with her family right after Thanksgiving) to the Ambassador’s residence for a “Town Hall” and Thanksgiving celebration.  The Ambassador has only been in country for about a month, as his appointment had been delayed—surprise surprise—by the GOP for no discernible reason for over a year.  Ambassador Harrington seems to be a pretty cool guy – esp. since he is a Returned PC Volunteer, himself.  J  Served in Mauritania, I think. 

As mentioned above, there were about 50 or so ex-pats under 3 large tents in the not-as-big-as-Wendy’s-backyard backyard.  Most were from the U.S. Mission related orgs (Embassy, USAID, CDC, DoD, PC, etc.), but then there were also folks from the smattering of various U.S./western NGOs operating in Lesotho – including Baylor University and the Okie I mentioned in an earlier blog post working here on ending human trafficking.  The latter actually gave a “Boomer” shout out while I was introducing myself that I unfortunately did not hear, so he came over and gave me crap later and we commiserated over OU’s “disappointing” season.

Turns out, amongst the various ex-pats there, around a dozen are former PCVs, so that was kind of cool.  And the guy sitting next to me – a “colorful” older guy who owns a fair amount of property around town, including a space we looked at for our possible new office space – stood up and gave a nice speech about how much he respects Peace Corps and appreciates the work we’re doing here, etc., which got a nice round of applause.  PC is definitely well-regarded amongst the Embassy and other ex-pats, which is kinda cool, but can also be kind of “challenging” when they want to run out and visit PCVs, take them to dinner, hear their stories, etc.  It’s almost like they see them as cute pets or zoo oddities to go gawk at and then return to their nice homes and Western “luxuries” while the PCVs toil away in their electricity-less rondevals and pee buckets.  But such is life.

The Ambassador’s Thanksgiving spread was pretty nice and definitely better-stocked on the dessert side.  And while they did not have mashed potatoes, they did have stuffing, so at the end of the day/week, I ended up getting to have both.  J

The following Wednesday, I had my “formal” meet and greet with the Ambassador at the Embassy, since he’d arrived while I was in DC, and it further confirmed my thoughts that he seems to be pretty cool.  Obviously, as an RPCV, he has a fondness for PC, and wants to help if/where he can.  Also turns out he’s a board game freak, too, so we’ve agreed to tag team hosting game nights for those interested.

The meeting ended on a somewhat amusing note as we discussed the just-discovered fact that the Chef he had used for their Thanksgiving – a local guy who actually was formerly the chef for a previous Ambassador AND who had also cooked the PC Thanksgiving meal at Wendy’s place – tried to shake the Ambassador down for a “fee” that we at PC had supposedly charged him to allow him to use the kitchen at our former training site to cook all the turkeys for the Ambassador’s get together.  I confirmed that, of course we had NOT charged him to use the facility (even though I had joked about it to our General Services Manager when he called me to get the okay).  I mean, how dumb can you be to not think we would not talk/compare stories and/or would not be wondering where the receipt was?  Dude just lost some serious business.  Ah well.

So now we turn to Christmas, even with our consistent 80-degrees-that-always-feels-hotter, bright sunny weather.  I am hosting a housewarming/holiday party for all the PC staff to show off my new place and also just coz I love the holidays, and I am also looking forward to unwrapping the “mystery” present I discovered in one of my boxes when I unpacked.  I seriously have no clue/memory of what it is.  I do feel pretty certain it was something generic I had bought, wrapped, and put under the tree in case it turned out I forgot someone for Christmas in 2012 when I was in Oklahoma, or in case someone got me something and I had not gotten them anything, or, actually who knows what it is or was for?  But at least I have something exciting to look forward to opening on Christmas!  J

Weeping forefathers!

It took a trip to Philadelphia to make me realize that Americans – on a “macro” level – are even more despicable than the mainland Chinese.  Yes, I still believe most of the mainland Chinese are rude, uncouth, selfish, etc., but the great unwashed masses of Americans – as clearly demonstrated by the latest election – are shamefully undeserving of the blood, sweat, and tears our forefathers spilled to make this country.

Unlike that commie SueLin Poh, I’m a big fan of American history, so my first ever trip to Philadelphia produced many a “lump in my throat” and “wet eye” moment. Being in the room where they debated and signed the Declaration of Independence and the Constitution, going through the Liberty Bell center, hearing all the stories (most I knew, but some I didn’t), well, it was all very “impactful.”

Particularly inspiring was the story of Cesar Rodney – the guy on horseback on the Delaware quarter (yes, I am ashamed to admit I, too, assumed that was Paul Revere).  During the debate over the Declaration of Independence, they wanted unanimity, but a couple of states were hold-outs (e.g., New York).  Delaware’s two delegates at the convention were split, so the one in favor of independence got a message to Rodney—their 3^rd delegate who was in Delaware quashing a loyalist uprising—that he was urgently needed to break the Delaware tie and push the other states into siding for independence.  Even though dude was sick, he got on a horse and rode 80 miles for 18 hours through a rainy thunderstorm and arrived at Independence Hall muddy, wet, tired, and seriously ill but just in time to break the Delaware tie which then led to the unanimous vote for Independence. 

Cue the stirring music and this awesome quote from John Adams after the Declaration was agreed on:  “I am well aware of the toil, and blood, and treasure, that it will cost us to maintain this declaration, and support and defend these States. Yet, through all the gloom, I can see the rays of ravishing light and glory.”

Ravishing light and glory indeed.  Fast forward nearly 240 years:  We’ve had 63 straight months of economic expansion, we’re currently enjoying the longest period of private job sector growth in our nation’s history, unemployment has been nearly halved in the past 5 years, the stock market continues to set new records, the deficit has been cut by 2/3 in the same time period, spending is increasing at the slowest rate since Eisenhower, millions more Americans now have health insurance and healthcare costs have finally slowed down, we have the fewest soldiers in war zones in ten+ years,  Osama bin Laden’s been killed and there have been ZERO successful attacks by Al Qaeda in the U.S.  And yet, the majority of voters just elected a party that’s sole ideological tenet is to attack the Black guy. 

Think this “new” “leadership” will fix America’s aging infrastructure?  Ha! Don’t hold your breath.  Ready for banking reform? Action on climate change?  Immigration?  Gun violence?  Well, just keep on being “ready” coz you won’t see anything even close to approaching any of that in the next few years.

Don’t get me wrong, the Democrats are almost as despicable.  Running from a President who—granted—has not shown NEARLY enough leadership, rather than at least making an effort to tout the successes he’s managed to have while being blocked and bludgeoned at every opportunity.  Cowing to GOP bluster and evil.  Refusing to really stand up for the poor, the disenfranchised, women, etc.  They’re all despicable.  And this is what Rodney rode through the night for?

Our “system” is beyond corrupt and disgusting and dysfunctional.  Yes, money has helped rot it, yes slimy voter disenfranchisement and lowest-common-denominator/negative campaigning has led to the crippling inertia, but what is most maddening is that – at the end of the day – it wouldn’t be THAT hard to fix.  Public financing of campaigns for starters.  But something even more radical is needed; radical and yet common sensical: a license to vote.

Would you let an uneducated, unlicensed doctor operate on you?  Would you get in a car with a driver who is unlicensed/too stupid to know how to drive a car?  How would you like completely uneducated yahoos serving as teachers for your kids or nieces/nephews?

If we can all accept/agree that some things are just too important to be left in the hands of un-educated ignoramuses, why on earth do we allow them to perform THE most important function in a so-called democracy?   Fuck the voter ID laws, what we need are voter licensing laws.  You shouldn’t get a “Voting License” unless or until you can pass a simple test showing you have not only a basic understanding of our system of governance, but that you also don’t believe patently stupid things and/or egregious lies. 

Beyond knowing, for example, that there are three branches of government in the U.S. and what their basic functions are, you should also be able to know which parties have, for example, presided over the most economic growth, which have created significant current policies, etc.  Don’t know any of this stuff?  Well, boo hoo, go get your “learner’s manual” like you do for a driver’s license and study it until you DO know it.  Then, if you still want to be a hateful, misogynist, racist, knock yourself out.  At least you then had to do a little work to be allowed the franchise!

My visit to glamorous Thaba-Tseka!

My first night in Thaba-Tseka, I was able to see/meet/hang out with 4 volunteers all at once.  Two of them are “townies” – Evan and Travis.  One, Brandy, is in town temporarily due to an inability to return to her site about an hour outside of town (more on that later – it’s a very “interesting” reason), and one more, Katie, who lives about 10 mins. outside of town.

When I’d told this crew I was coming for a visit, they were very excited as the T-T folks apparently don’t get so many visits since they are pretty isolated/in the middle of the country and on the way to nowhere.  They asked me to pick up some things to bring with me from the capital (e.g., avocados, pork shoulder) that is hard for them to get so that they could cook for me (I DID help sift flour for tortillas!).  We ended up spending well over two hours to make carnitas tacos (mostly coz the pork had to slow cook, of course!).  But while waiting I got to chat with them, hear some stories, etc.

Much talk was about Brandy’s current “in limbo” status.  While the rest of the volunteers got to go back to their homes, host families, sites, etc. after consolidation, Brandy is staying temporarily slash indefinitely in the Thaba-Tseka camp town because HER host family is…wait for it….relatives/family of the rogue general Kamoli, who has yet to be captured, killed, exiled, or turn himself in.  I teased her that she had a great National Enquirer story in the making: blond, white American girl in love nest with General Coup!  J  I can’t remember now if she said she’s actually met him or not, but I think she said she has and that he is actually very normal, not scary at all, etc., and that his family is really cool.  So then I teased her about falling prey to a variation of “Stockholm Syndrome.”  To her credit, she was able to take all the ribbing and was in pretty high spirits, all things considered—partly coz she was getting to hang with some fellow volunteers in T-T, and of course partly due to getting to meet/hang out with the cool new PC Director of Management and Operations (C’est moi!).  Still, at the end of the day, she is understandably frustrated with being in limbo and is hoping for a resolution that will allow her to get back to being a real Peace Corps Volunteer and doing some work. 

As I mentioned briefly on Facebook, it was awesome fun hanging out with this group, cooking and eating, swapping stories, yapping about Peace Corps, etc.  Totally took me back to my own volunteer days.  Sigh.  At one point, while the pork was marinating, Evan and Travis took me to a nearby local bar to check out/experience some Lesotho nightlife.  It was a hoot.  First of all, Evan looks a bit like Bradley Cooper, and Travis acts a bit like a young Tom Cruise, circa “Cocktail.”  And, as the two white boys in town, they are semi-celebrities and were treated as such at the bar.  The bar that was ALL men.  Apparently, it’s just not “seemly” for a woman to go to a bar in Lesotho unless she is an admittedly/known alcoholic.  They can WORK at one – and in fact the bartender/pool table mistress/arbiter was a woman – but they just don’t hang out at the bar.  Speaking of the pool table, for some reason the balls here are smaller (yes, there is some irony there about small African balls).  Also, they don’t have the full regular set, although they DO have the right number, so there were, for example, 3 blue solids, and no 8 ball so they used the yellow 1 ball as the 8.  Evan and Travis (i.e., Bradley & Tom) tagged team against a local and won the first game and were destroyed the second, which was a good one to leave on, as there seemed to be mixed feelings about the “status” of playing against, let alone beating or losing to, the Americans.  Travis is also a minor local celebrity due to the fact that he plays on the local soccer team, which is supposedly pretty good AND a “a feeder team” to some pretty important major league soccer team.  I would know/remember more about this if I cared about soccer, but I did pick up enough to know it is, indeed, a “pretty big deal” all things considered.

The next day, I headed SE to visit two rural volunteers, about 30 minutes apart. The road from the town of Thaba-Tseka SE to the sites of a couple of VERY rural volunteers was—to put it charitably—rough.  Add to the fact I was with our “fast driver” and that said sketchy road often skirted/barely clung to the sides of mountains, and let’s just say it was an experience.  On the plus side, the scenery was often breathtaking.  I’ve seen many mountain ranges – including some that stretch significantly higher than these in Lesotho – but there’s something striking about these.  Partly it’s the way they “overlap,” partly it’s the way they “interact” with the sun & sky.  I’m not sure what’s different about it, and partly it was due, no doubt, to the occasional scattered clouds and the way the shadows played on the mountains, but it was often very, very striking. It’s definitely a beautiful country – or at least swaths of it are, so far.  J

Kara is perhaps our most isolated volunteer, and also the youngest.  But she is also very mature, very self-aware.  I ended up talking to her for over 3 hours and was very impressed.  I was actually very impressed with all of them,  They’ve all had issues, needless to say, working in Africa, but they’re all holding up well, making the best of their challenges, and having some awesome experiences.  I would love to be a “serial volunteer” – do a country for a couple years, then come back home to catch up with folks for awhile before heading back out, etc.  Sigh.

On Friday I saw a couple more volunteers that had absolutely incredible “roads” to get to their villages/houses.  Incredible as in I wouldn’t even consider them roads.  In fact, one volunteer offered up as we were bumping along to take her home that she usually has the taxi drop her off up the hill because she didn’t really consider the narrow, rutted, boulder-strewn path to her home a “road.”  I have to agree.

Even the well-paved roads between towns we had to share with random herd boys and their livestock – mostly sheep, but the occasional cows, many donkeys, and the occasional ox team and/or horses.  At one point, they were upgrading the road and building a pretty significant bridge to replace the previous narrow, very low to the river, sketchy bridge.  The crew working on this was partly Chinese, with a couple of Chinese construction trucks/vehicles, so the investment in Africa continues unabated by those sneaky Chinese!  J  And of course we were confronted with typical Chinese “cleverness”/cluelessness/assholery when we were coming back and got stuck behind a Chinese dump truck (ha, I accidentally first typed DUMB truck – talk about your Freudian slip!), sitting in the right of way so that we could not go around, waiting on another, nearby dump truck that was being filled.  Note that the dump truck sitting/blocking us knew we were behind, trying to get around, AND he very easily could have moved over to the shoulder behind or in front of the other dump truck, but he just sat there, an asshole, until the other truck was filled and took off, and then took his sweet time moving to take his place.  Needless to say, despite all their “investment” the Chinese are NOT making friends here!

Reflections on China

I went for a Sunday breakfast at this place called “Spur Steak Ranches” – a Native American-themed South African chain down the street in the Pioneer Mall (it’s like I’m living in the Old West!).  My booth was adjacent to one with a trio of Chinese ex-pats and we both had the same waiter – a very polite young man that provided good service (the service here in the restaurants has so far been very good).  After making a total mess of their table, getting a doggie bag (Really? Who takes home leftovers from breakfast?), etc., they completely stiffed the waiter.  He was clearly shocked and actually called them out to see if maybe they’d forgotten – he wasn’t mean or aggressive about it, more like shocked and hurt.  Of course the Chinese guy he was following away from their booth just gave him an incredibly smug and condescending smile, while digging in his teeth with a toothpick – making NO attempt to be discreet about it, either, of course.

Boy did that take me back! And upon reflection, it’s nearly impossible for me to convey in words the contempt I feel for the Chinese (in China) on a macro level after living among them.  Yes, most of the people I worked with at Disney were okay, but they themselves will admit they are “different.”  And yes, there are assholes in America, too – a lot of them.  But, again, on a macro level – on a “per capita” basis – the (mainland) Chinese are rude, selfish, disgustingly uncouth and often appallingly unhygienic, arrogant, savage, clueless, mean-spirited, selfish, hateful, inconsiderate, racist, and xenophobic, I could go on and on.  It reminds me of the line in “Gone With The Wind” when Scarlett O’Hara laments, “Oh, I just can’t think of anything bad enough to call you!”  And if you think I’m exaggerating, I could give you person after person after person who will back me up – and not just other Americans.

Multiple people have now told me (and not just Disney English folks or Westerners that I met while living there) they didn’t like the kind of person they were turning into after spending much time around the Chinese. And what makes it all ten times worse is their laughable arrogance.  They genuinely believe they are a “superior” people.  And while that may have been true several hundred years ago, it’s not even close to being true today – and not by a long shot  (Of course, America is certainly not close to being a “superior” country/civilization itself, so it’s not like I’m trying to slam another country to build “my own” up).  Granted, said arrogance comes from their parochialism and cluelessness--but living amongst them, experiencing the appalling level of their overall assholery and savagery, it is just that much more horrible to experience when they are SO unaware of the sheer scope of their douchebaggery. Or incompetence. The banks, postal system, etc. are all laughably inefficient and seem to be run by morons. There’s an almost comic “am I being punked?” paranoia, inefficiency, and bureaucracy. And don’t get me started on their shoddy construction!

And if you think I’m being unduly harsh, note: even other Chinese feel the same way!  Go to Hong Kong and talk to the Chinese there and they will sniff disdainfully when discussing “mainlanders.”  Ditto for Taiwan.  My friend Bex stayed with a Chinese family during a trip to Hong Kong and mentioned she had a 2-bedroom apartment if they ever wanted a place to stay in Guangzhou.  They looked at her as if she was insane and basically said, “Oh, ewww, we don’t go to the mainland!”  While on the one hand it seems silly to go through passport control between Guangzhou, China and Hong Kong, China, it really IS like a different country.  No smell.  Efficient.  Clean.  Etc.  Singaporeans, about 70% Chinese, are so disdainful of their mainland cousins, they won’t rent to them – finding them to be many of the things I’ve mentioned above.

And while I’m “enlightening” folks about the Chinese, let’s dispel a few myths:  Industrious and hard-working?  HA!   I mean, I thought people were “lazy” in Hawai’i – but there it really IS more about “island style” kind of living.  Just mellow and chill.  The Chinese – again, on a macro level, with exceptions that prove the rule – are not only grossly incompetent in many, many areas, but also supremely lazy. I saw people asleep there EVERYWHERE – and at every time of day.  In fact, more than one local I met, actually bragged about how lazy they are!  Seriously! You may ask, “But how do they throw up a 50 story office tower in 3 months?”  Duh, it’s easy when you put 10,000 slaves on it and have them do a half-ass job.  Almost everything is done in a shoddy manner with cut-rate materials and—apparently—zero quality control.

That old chestnut about the Chinese being a patient people?  Hahahahahahahaha.  I can only imagine this may have been the case hundreds of years ago, but, man, if you thought Americans were impatient…..the drivers will honk at you for slowing down to turn a corner. And while part of why they may push ahead of you in the food line, store, metro, elevator, cab, etc. is just because they enjoy being assholes, they just can’t be bothered to wait for ANYTHING.  One of the few “joys” I had there – and, again, tempered by the fact that they’re just such assholes – was watching when their impatience warred with their laziness.  It’s truly a satisfying sight to behold – as well as to try to antagonize.  Seriously, I totally get the folks who say they couldn’t stay longer amongst the Chinese coz they didn’t like the kind of person they were turning into.  I took malicious glee in blocking someone from trying to shove past/ahead of me to get on the Metro, would deliberately punch the “door close” button on the elevator when I saw someone entering my lobby, etc. 

And they put the group before the individual?  Don’t make me laugh! Again, I thought Americans reigned supreme when it came to a “Me first” mentality – but they are mere amateurs compared to the Chinese.  Unless you’re an immediate family member (and even that’s iffy), they would just as soon let a building full of children burn down if it meant them not getting to the front counter to get their fucking rice that very moment—in fact, they’d probably be ecstatic/think they won a prize, if people ahead of them rushed to put out the fire because then they’d get their food quicker.  Of course I’m being silly coz no Chinese person would rush to help put out a fire—hell, if one of their fellow human beings passes out on the train in front of them, they can’t get away fast enough.  Witness:

http://www.thenanfang.com/blog/foreigner-faints-on-shanghai-metro-other-passengers-run-away/

We used to have debates at DE about whether they are assholes or just stupid in a completely clueless way.  The drivers do astonishingly stupid things on a regular basis.  They genuinely don’t seem to understand how elevators work, often pushing both the up AND down buttons to (I guess?) get it to come quicker.  And then going ahead and getting on when it’s going the opposite direction (to “save a space” I suppose?) w/o even bothering to look/realize the other elevator is a couple floors away and headed in the direction they want. My building had two elevators that were constantly busy and you’d have to wait for.  But if both happened to come down to the lobby at the same time, and say about 4 individuals were waiting, they would deliberately “split up” and take both elevators to not have to ride with too many of their fellow human beings, even if it meant both elevators then working their way up 20+ floors meaning new people coming in the building would be forced to wait.  They will consistently line up straight out from a building to get lunch, completely blocking the sidewalk, rather than lining up perpendicular to said building/along the sidewalk.  Again: stupid or just asshole?  They will stand right on top of arrows at the Metro facing the other way – staring straight at signs that say don’t block the entrance, don’t push, civil ride, etc.  Despite repeated pleas in the office for the young women to quit spending 20-30 minutes at a time in the one staff toilet on their cell phones, doing their hair (when it could be done in the locker room), etc. when teachers would be trying to squeeze in a pee between classes, they would continue to do so – again: stupid or just asshole?  They will do major repairs, banging and working on their apartments from 1-5 in the morning, despite repeated pleas to be quiet.  Again, I could go on and on. 

Obviously, no country is perfect.  I mean, can an American really judge any other country considering, for example, our own horrific prison system?  Or the endemic racism?  The out-of-control cops.  The outrageous violence and constant killing.  The continued welfare billions for huge corporate farms while cutting food stamps.  “Standing your ground” against black kids or Alzheimer’s victims.  The fact that the Iraq war could have fully funded social security.  The stupid media obsessions with things like that asshole on Duck Dynasty or Obama taking a selfie.  Although I didn’t spend a LOT of time there, my sense is the Nordic countries are the ones doing it “right” – on the whole. And I’ll certainly be curious to see how Lesotho “stacks up” considering its own challenges.  But at the end of the day, I’m definitely glad to be out of China – and, considering the continued implosion, not too unhappy about being out of the states, as well.

Coups, and Okies, and Movies, oh my!

The one movie theater in town closed!  L  Talk about a bummer – I was more upset about this than the so-called “coup.”  That was going to be my weekly “culture.”  As it is, I only got in two weekends before it shut down – catching “Guardians of the Galaxy” (my 2^nd viewing after seeing it in Hong Kong) and then the latest “Step Up” movie which I would otherwise not bother with if there had been any other decent options (as it was, “Step Up” had its moments).  Unclear as to if they closed due to poor business or were sort-of-forced to vacate to make room for more/other shops.  Said theater was located in the Pioneer Mall which is one of THE social outlets in exciting Maseru!

Here’s the most amazing thing about the recent/current “instability.”  For that week when the police basically stepped off the job/quit working/went into hiding, the city did not dissolve into complete anarchy.  Think about it: if a similar-sized city in America (e.g., Buffalo, Lubbock, Reno, Baton Rouge) suddenly found themselves with NO operating police force – and everyone knew it – can you even imagine the chaos?  The looting?  The crime?  That’s why I was so amazed to see Maseru appear in that list I recently posted on FB for the world’s most dangerous cities.  I think the local populace is to be commended for the fact that the malls and shops are still standing “un-looted,” that the city wasn’t burnt to the ground, etc.  Amazing.

Anyway, despite Lesotho’s current “challenges,” at least they’re not as effed up and evil about their visa policies.  One of our volunteers, for a variety of personal reasons, decided to overstay her 7-day S. Africa visa and was detained trying to return to Lesotho.  Worse yet, said volunteer had not even notified post she was going to S. Africa, so the surprise was on us!  As punishment, said volunteer has been banned from S. Africa for two years.  The problem with this is she has since resigned, but is unable to leave the country because S. Africa won’t even let her fly through!  And EVERY flight from Lesotho goes through S. Africa – specifically, “Joburg” (i.e., Joahannesburg).  Now, granted, this volunteer brought this on herself by being so dumb, but honestly, S. Africa is incredibly lame for forcing people to even go through immigration in Joburg for flights that are coming from Lesotho folks going on to other Int’l destinations.  I’ve been in a fair number of airports travelling internationally, connecting from one country to another – including a flight from China to Denmark that connected in Moscow – and didn’t have to deal with the hassle of immigration en route.  I mean, I know S. Africa is a beautiful country, and has many “advantages” over some of their African neighbors, but seriously, guys, grow up.  There are MANY easier ways – MANY – to try and sneak into the country than through a connecting int’l flight in the Joburg airport. 

Speaking of Joburg, Peace Corps Lesotho currently prohibits volunteers from even staying there – deeming it too violent.  It’s the only city in S. Africa that is prohibited – hmmm, I wonder if this stricture was put in place once Doreen got there and stirred shit up?  Confess, Doreen!  J  I’ll probably talk more about this in a later post, but for those who feel Peace Corps doesn’t do enough to protect volunteers, I’m at a loss to know what more they could do.  Remember when I said it was “strongly suggested” to me to not walk at night here in Maseru?  Well, in the PC Lesotho Volunteer Handbook, it says in bold type for any volunteers visiting/staying in Maseru:  Walking at night is prohibited. Volunteers found walking after dark will be asked to resign or will be administratively separated.  Clearly, I still have teenage boy strains running through me because I am almost – almost – tempted to go out walking at night just to see how scary it is!  J  In fact, just the other night, with the country supposedly still on pins & needles awaiting the capture of the rogue general, I heard what sounded like a pretty serious street party going on right near my hotel.  I seriously wanted to creep out into the forbidden darkness just to see what was what.  As it was, I contented myself with slipping out of my hotel flat, and creeping near the hotel wall just to listen.  Yes, that’s what passes for excitement for me here now.

Speaking of excitement, I actually met an Okie here in Maseru!  Dude works for an NGO working to end human trafficking.  For my local okie readers, you’ll know the coolness of this: He actually went to high school with Sam!  Oooooh!  J  We both squealed over the upcoming football season and then (he more than I) went on a bit about “the Thunder.”  It’s truly a small world.  Apparently, this org was started by a group of ORU grads (that’s Oral Roberts University for you not-in-the-know-non-Okies), so there’s actually a couple of them here.

THEN, just this past weekend, at an Embassy BBQ welcoming the new Charge d’Affaires, I discovered that the Ambassador’s Executive Secretary is ALSO from Oklahoma.  She’s quite the saucily entertaining thing, as well. When she – and the rest of the group - heard I’d spent most of my “growing up” years in Oklahoma, we all swapped “It’s a Small World” stories – alas, without singing the song.

I’ve just started “dipping my toe” into learning the language.  One of my biggest regrets is that I am NOT a natural when it comes to picking up languages.  Not counting English, I have now studied seven different languages and could not speak any of them well enough outside of how to direct a taxi driver in Mandarin and speak just enough Russian to entertain folks who don’t speak it at all.

So far, in Sotho, I can say Hello, Thanks, Sir, and Ma’am.  The latter two are critically important, as everyone uses them in speaking to everyone else.  Additionally, luckily, while learning to pronounce some of the difficult (for me) names, it is quite acceptable and normal to just simply refer to women as ‘M’e (pronounced may, meaning ma’am) and Ntate (pronounced en-tot-ay, meaning sir).  Hello is spelled Lumela, but pronounced Dumela (of course!), and thank you is Kea Leboha. Luckily, the vast majority of the population speaks English anyway, but I’m still going to give learning the language the old college try.

Folks are very polite here—it’s the complete opposite of China—and many will greet you on the street, “Hello, Ntate!”  With some exceptions, restaurant service is the best I’ve experienced in the world.  Attentive without being overbearing, watchful for when you need something without hovering or pestering you.  I have yet to have had occasion to leave less than the standard tip, and more often than not give more.  Store clerks are all friendly, etc.  After China, it’s like being on another planet or confronting an entirely different species.

There are two major grocery stores—and I think both might be S. African chains.  Both the Pick n Pay and the Shop-Rite have a good mix of products, with many American products, and even more quality S. African products.  The meat here is good (still haven’t found out why they call the big hot dogs “Russians” but finally just decided/assumed it’s similar to the rationale for Americans using the name “Polish Sausage”), and the only thing I’m really missing so far is Mexican food.  But I should be able to make my own (although, now that I think about it, I haven’t seen tortillas—plenty of tortilla chips/Fritos/Doritos, but no tortillas).  Luckily, there’s a mid-range steakhouse here – Spur (a S. African chain) – that serves a decent nachos, so I have that for when I’m desperate.  J

Coup Chasing!

So apparently I’m a “coup magnet.”  Thailand, Lesotho – they just follow me wherever I go. Although the Thai coup happened before I got there – so in that case, I guess I was a “coup chaser.”  Politics in Lesotho are, obviously, quite interesting right now.  The current Prime Minister got the King to let him suspend Parliament – which is actually an option written into the Lesotho Constitution – for 9 months because he feared they would give him a vote of “no confidence” and force his ouster.

The Deputy Prime Minister, from another political party, of course wants Parliament back in session, so he called for a “peaceful demonstration”/march for Monday (while you lazy Americans have the day off for Labor Day).  But, apparently, some folks couldn’t wait for the fun to start, and got the ball rolling early Saturday morning when the Lesotho Army decided to surround the main Police Headquarters (the former supports the DPM while the latter support the PM).  Anyway, life goes on in most of the capital, and after getting my “Embassy alert” and chatting with the other Peace Corps managers, I still went to the mall for breakfast and sheer curiosity Saturday morning.  And all I saw was everyone going about their regular lives.  Even though the main police stations is like 4-5 blocks away.

If things get too hairy, I guess the Lesotho air force will have to deploy their ONE helicopter – but that’s assuming it’s actually in working order AND they have the paraffin needed to get it in the air.  Seriously, I couldn’t make that up!

But to be honest, I was much more excited about the brief hailstorm we had last week when I went to the Embassy for a meeting.  My PC driver wouldn’t let me get out of the car as it started hailing just as we pulled up to the building where the meeting was.  The hail was about marble size (shooter marbles) and came down long enough to pretty much completely cover the ground.  Not only was I enthralled, but one of the Embassy employees came out to stand under the eave and take pictures – cheerily waving at me in the car.  I have to admit, it’s kinda cool living in a place with “real” weather – shades of Oklahoma!

UPDATE ON THE “COUP”: So the PM fled the country after the “attempted coup” by the military – which they deny was a coup even though if ANYONE is running the country right now it’s the military.  he “top cop” was killed and the army stormed and/or surrounded various police stations, scaring off all the high ranking officers who followed the PM to S. Africa.  The rest of the police pretty much disbanded so they wouldn’t get taken out by the military – although some officers are supposedly working as “plainclothes” police.

The Monday march was cancelled, who knows why, but maybe because no one is really in charge.  The Deputy PM went to S. Africa to engage in talks led by the S.A. President.  Although he is not trusted since it was his political minion, the current (kind of) head of the military who launched this latest brouhaha by refusing to step down upon order of the King and Prime Minister.  Their replacement tried to take his office/duties, and was promptly shot at, so HE fled the country, too. 

While it has remained relatively quiet in the capital (beyond the army’s threatening of the police), there has been a real concern amongst locals, the Embassy/State Dept., etc. that things could devolve very quickly – particularly since there are no police.  i.e., what’s to stop someone from just going to the mall and robbing it? 

SO, the “core staff” got called in to the office on our Labor Day holiday to strategize.  After discussion, and after being notified that the Embassy evacuated all family members of State Dept. employees, we called all volunteers to be on “Standfast” which means they could go about their work, but not to leave their villages, not to travel, etc.  After more back and forth, some posturing from the Lesotho PM who asked the S. African military to come and restore order (and him to office, of course), and a conference call with PC HQ in DC (dig those acronyms!), we decided to go ahead and move to the next stage and “consolidate” all volunteers.  This basically means they all leave their villages to a pre-determined meeting point/hotel so they will be all together in just 4-5 groups – all near the border for quicker/easier evacuation, if necessary.

So then we had to call them all to give them that directive to go to their consolidation point first thing in the morning.  At the end of the day, my “Labor Day Holiday” actually consisted of a 13-hour day at the office!  “Yay!”

The Embassy also “strongly suggested” that me and the other 2 Americans staying at the same hotel with me move to a “secure” private residence.  (I haven’t yet moved into my house because the guy I’m replacing still has one more week here).  I passed on that for now, but we’ll see how things go.

So that’s where things stand right now.  I have to say, although I am basing this purely on my own gut since I’ve only been in the country for 3 weeks, I’m not really that concerned.  The sense I get is that a lot of these guys are just “playing war” – although there is, of course, a genuine power struggle going on.  I could be wrong, but my wild guess is that, at worst, the S. African (or, technically, SADC) forces will come in to make sure things don’t get nasty, the PM will return and he will either be forced to recall Parliament, or not with the understanding that new elections will be held at the end of the 9 month suspension (which is the limit the Parliament can be suspended according to the Constitution).  Of, course, I guess it’s also possible things could devolve very quickly, anarchy will ensue, and this will be the last post you’ll ever see from me.  ;)

Postcard from Lesotho I

So my first thought as we were driving in to Maseru from the airport was, “WOW, I am living in Africa! AFRICA!” I’m glad that, at my age, I can still get so excited about stuff like this. :)

After checking in to the motel and getting settled, the Country Director (Wendy) took me to lunch at a fairly decent seafood place at the nearby mall, where I had a decent fish & chips. We chatted about general stuff, logistics/itinerary for my first week, and she gave me her major “tip” for Maseru: don’t walk outside alone after dark. She then added that if I were to be mugged – esp. by someone brandishing a weapon – to NOT fight it, and just hand over my stuff. On the flip side, she said if I were being kidnapped – that is, if someone were actually trying to take ME and not just my money, she said to fight that for all it’s worth. She didn’t bother to say why, and I guessed enough to not even ask. She then repeated this basic advice once more a little later, mentioning that a PCV had, in fact, been murdered back in 2010 not too far from our office. Needless to say, now I was REALLY excited about being in Africa! :)

With that being said, it appears to be safe during the day. At a hotel mixer, I met a woman doing intellectual property work who had been here about six months and she said she liked Maseru, overall, and one of the things she liked was that it was so ‘safe’ – and then she said, “Of course I wouldn’t go out walking alone after dark.”

 My hotel digs are pretty nice – it’s actually a “flat,” with a separate living room, bedroom, and dining room/kitchen. My bathroom even has a bathtub which I promptly took advantage of since I’ve been living for the past year + without one. I’ll be here for a couple weeks while the guy whose place I’m taking trains me and lives in the house. Friday, after my first week at work, he took me by the house to get a good look at it and I was shocked to see that it was even much bigger than the pics I was sent. There are three bedrooms, FOUR full bathrooms (plus a half bath), two living areas (one with a fireplace), a good-sized separate dining room, a big kitchen with another table in there for eating, a laundry room with W/D, and another small room currently empty/being used for nothing that may become my library. There is also a two-car garage, a large yard surrounding the house that has grape vines all along the back and one side wall, and a good-sized garden. The whole thing is surrounded by a stone wall, and there’s a gated entrance with 24/7 security. I have the option of getting another place, so right now I’m debating on the “pros” of having such a huge place to myself with the cones of feeling like it’s just a bit much. We’ll see.

The weather is awesome so far. It’s odd to be in a country where it’s “winter” in August, but so far the temperature has been pretty moderate/nice – like lower 60s during the day. But my sinuses and eyes are bothering me and I’m hoping it’s just a temporary thing as I adjust. It still gets pretty cold at night (like upper 30s).

On just my third day, we happened to be swearing in a new group of volunteers (see pics on FB). Their ceremony was significantly more elaborate than my own in Kazakhstan and involved quite a bit more “local color.” It was held in a village just outside Maseru, lasted for two hours, and included speeches from 3-4 local dignitaries – including the head chief of the village, a member of parliament, and one of the government ministers. The volunteers were sworn in by the new Charge d’Affairs from the U.S. Embassy as the Lesotho ambassadorship is currently empty. I was really “feeling” the local color when I heard the cheer/yell the local women give for certain dignitaries, or in response to speech highlights, or just to give a “shout out” to certain folks. It would be impossible for me to reproduce it. At first it sounded kinda scary, actually. It sounds a little like a yodel, except it’s the same two-syllable sound repeated many times – probably the closest I can come to describing it is….no, I just can’t describe it. I am impressed with these volunteers – while my group, too, lived with a host family during training, the Lesotho PCVs’ living conditions were/are much “starker,” and will be so in the villages in which they’ll be working. Most will not have running water, many will not have electricity, etc. I’ll really be curious to see what it’s like when I do some site visits.

As for my job, so far it’s mostly been reading up on manuals, signing boatloads of spending authorizations, and meeting folks. I’ve been reminded how frustrating it is to start a new job – not knowing anyone, anything, waiting to get up to speed, etc. I’m also one of the rare hires who is coming to country/post without first going through the Overseas Training (OST) in DC. Due to timing/need, I’ve started in country right away and will go to the next OST towards the end of October.

Here’s the first “culture thing” I am NOT appreciating/understanding: The drivers seem to honk just for the hell of it. Maseru is NOT a large city, and the traffic is not bad at all, and yet drivers will randomly honk or possibly in greeting. I HOPE I can get used to it, but right now it just seems incredibly stupid/lame and is very annoying. The Programming Director says it’s actually just to let people know they’re available. But there are tons of taxis and it’s not like it’d be that hard for you flag one down. The honking ones are called 4+1s (4 passengers plus the driver), but they are NOT metered, and you never know when you’d get to your destination, since they can still look for more passengers (beep beep! beep beep! beeeeeep!) until they are full. More expensive taxis can be hired for door-to-door. But the people are friendly enough (again, esp. compared to the Chinese), and I don’t get nearly as many stares as I did in China/SE Asia, though there appear to be just as few white folks here.

Finally, a fun fact: they call hot dogs “Russians” here. Actually, they’re kind of in between a hot dog and a Polish sausage and are pretty good. But I can’t find anyone here who knows why they are called “Russians.” Sergei? Stas? Anyone wanna venture a guess as to why?

Bye bye long holiday! Notes on Yogyakarta and Bali.

Boy, do they love their strawberry soda in SE Asia (esp. Indonesia) – you can’t find orange soda, but everyone has got Fanta (or at the very least, Mirinda) strawberry soda!

Traffic was just as bad in Yogyakarta as Jakarta.  Honestly, you can’t brag about being the 3^rd largest democracy, 4^th most populated country in the world, if you can’t do a better job of un-snarling your traffic.  I know there are similar problems in some cities in the states, but honestly, the difference is still remarkable.  And it’s exacerbated by the sheer ignorance and pig-headedness of drivers here who clearly think lane markings are a very vague suggestion and honk and cram their way back and forth between/in the middle/around lanes to try and gain an inch or two.  News flash: that kind of incessant maneuvering makes traffic WORSE and makes it go SLOWER.  I noticed similar stupidity in Thailand and China.  I actually started to wonder if it’s a matter of education levels.  School doesn’t just teach you “stuff” – it teaches you to THINK: math teaches you to think logically, History & English to think critically and analytically, Arts & Music to think creatively and empathetically.  If you have vast swaths of a population that just haven’t learned to “think” (and then the ones who do get an education move, creating 'brain drains'), it’s no wonder when infrastructure makes no sense or is crap, that driving sucks, etc.  Think about the cleanest, richest, most smoothly operating and humane societies in the world – they’re also the most educated.  Race/ethnicity has nothing to do with it (IMHO), and as education “regresses” in the U.S. you see how the country itself is devolving at the same time.

On the whole, Yogyakarta was okay.  Again, no transit system, but the city's not that big (just over half a million), and really the main thing to see are the temples: particularly Borobudur.  But I did also get to Candi Prambanan (Candi means Temple), which was a convenient 30 minute walk down the road from my hotel – with a quick stop on the way (actually almost right across the street) to Candi Kalasan – very small and kind of odd to just see it right there, right off the street, tucked between housing.  Prambanan is a Hindu temple from the 9^th century and the only “downside” to it was the meandering way you had to enter – again, where is the thought process that goes into this stuff?

As for Borodubur – Mr. Toad had nothing on my experience seeing that!  First off, when I asked about a tour to see it at the hotel, I was told it would be 300,000 Rupiah (about $27) bucks, so I asked to book it for Saturday.  Then I was told, “Oh, oops, because it’s a holiday and the traffic is really bad, it will be 400,000” so whatever I said that’d be fine and booked it for 9am.

Turns out I was the only one going but the “guide” picked me up promptly at 9am and we were off (you’ll see soon why I put “guide” in quotes).  After traveling the main road for awhile, the driver then took a side road.  Then another.  And another.  Clearly he was doing this to avoid the horrific traffic headed to Borodubur on the main road.  But at some point, as we were bouncing and jarring our way down increasingly narrow and crater-infested “roads,” he got lost.  Luckily, it turns out he had not gone TOO far out of the way before doubling back, but with all his meandering around I had to wonder if he really was saving any time – particularly considering how slowly he had to navigate some of the narrow/bumpy/cavern-filled roads.  It ended up taking 2 hours to go about 30 miles.  Seriously.  And this was supposedly the quicker way.

When we were approaching the entrance to the temple, he turns to me and says, “Sorry, no free parking.”  I just looked at him blankly, he went a little farther, and as he got to the parking entrance, he turned again and said, “Sorry, 5000 Rupiah to park.”  I said, “Um, this is a tour, right? Why would I pay for the parking?”  I don’t think he understood, and so he just paid.  Then, after parking, we headed to the ticket booth where he then clearly expected me to pay for my ticket.  By this time I was torn between laughing and thinking, “WTF kind of ghetto ‘tour’ company did I end up with?” So I said, “Okay, I don’t understand. When I booked this at the hotel, I was told it was a tour to see Borodubur and they told me I could pay for said tour with my credit card at the end.”  Bless his heart, HE was confused, too, and clearly still expected me to pay, so I brought out my Visa and the ticket taker said, “Sorry, cash only.”  Yes, cash only at a UNESCO World Heritage Site, when Prambanan, much lesser known, and nearby, and costing about the same (200,000 Rupiah) takes credit cards.  I only had about 150,000 Rupiah on me at this point so the driver called his boss, whose English was a little better, I explained the situation, said I could get money if there was a BCA ATM nearby (the only one in Indonesia that takes my Chinese ATM – though, granted, I had not had much trouble finding BCA ATMs in Jakarta), but of course we couldn’t find one after wandering around in the 90+ degree heat and ridiculous humidity, so back on the phone with the boss who said he could arrange to have someone pay for me if I added it to my credit card when I got back.  So then we trucked around to some vendor booth near the exit where the driver got money, trucked back to the entrance to get my ticket, and then he ushered me to the entrance to the temple grounds and said, “See you at exit in one hour.”  So no guide.  In actuality, the “tour” then was really only “transportation.”  Actually, as he was leaving me at the entrance, there were tour guides offering their service, but I wasn’t going to keep adding on to the already increasing cost of my “tour.”

Borobudur, as the largest Buddhist temple in the world, is naturally the most visited attraction in Indonesia.  And, as it was just after Ramadan, when Muslims could travel again, it was even more jam-packed than usual.  Combine this with the afore-mentioned double 90 heat/humidity, and I thought I was going to die.  I actually busted out my little silver umbrella like so many other visitors and used it to try and block some of the merciless sun/heat.  Needless to say, the temple isn’t quite so “enjoyable” when you’re moving along with a mob of people.  It was also disappointing to find that they had no “lookout” or anything to get a nice view of the temple as a whole – which is what really makes it look impressive.  I had to search on Google for a “bird’s eye view” to add to my own pics.  But, at the end of the day, I’m glad I saw it.  It’s pretty cool, definitely huge, and now I can say I’ve been to the 2^nd and 3^rd largest temples in the entire world (Karnak in Egypt is 2^nd) – but, based on the mass of humanity, and the stories I’ve heard of just as bad if not worse masses of humanity at #1, I don’t think I’ll be going to see Angkor Wat anytime soon.  L

And then, of course, when I came out to the exit after an hour, the driver was nowhere to be seen.  I waited 10 mins. then 20, and started to panic.  I was 2 hours from my hotel, with no phone, no numbers to call anyone anyway, and a flight that evening to Bali.  I waited another 10 minutes then tried to find my way to where we’d parked – hoping I could remember which gray van was the one we came in, when the driver popped up, all smiles, and asked if I was ready to go.  I definitely was.

I ended my time in Indonesia with a few days in Bali.  And, as mentioned on Facebook, Bali is to the rest of Indonesia as Hong Kong is to China.  Much cleaner, nicer, funner, prettier, etc.  But, on the flip side, it’s not like it’s that much more special (in fact, it’s not) than Hawai’i.  I guess living for three years in “paradise” makes it not really that necessary to see other ones.

I DID really like the hotel I was in, though – particularly the infinity pool.  I spent more time in that than on the beach, as it was cool to hang out at the edge of it, looking down on the strip and waiting for one of the passersby to happen to look up, figure out what it was and gawk/point.  J

Bali was also more annoying than Hawai’i due to the ubiquitous “Massage?” queries. I’d really be curious to know how many times I heard that one word question during the two days I spent roaming around Kuta.  Worse, some of them actually touch you/semi-grab your shoulder or arm as they make their “pitch.”  I’m not one of those people who really dislikes being touched, but I definitely do not “appreciate” being touched by strangers trying to get me to buy something I have no interest in.  But, at the end of the day, I’m glad I ended my Indonesian adventure with Bali.

But OF COURSE I could not escape Indonesia w/o more drama.  I had been “disappointed” to find that after you check in for your flight, you are then hit up by the airport for an “airport fee” before you go through security.  Yes, they add fees on to flights in the U.S., but it’s all on the ticket, you can charge it, etc.  I had to pay 40,000 Rupiah to go from Jakarta to Yogyakarta, 35,000 from Yogyakarta to Bali, and then 30,000 from Bali back to Jakarta.  To be safe, I kept aside 60,000 to leave Jakarta for Hong Kong, and then managed to spend the rest of my FRupiah so I wouldn’t leave with any.  But OF COURSE, they wanted 150,000(!) Rupiah to leave Jakarta.  I explained I didn’t have that much, and asked to charge it.  No dice.  I had not seen an ATMs in the departure terminal that took my Union Pay ATM card.  I asked them what I could do.  They were totally unsympathetic, blamed the “airport administration” and insisted that even tho I’d already bought/paid for a ticket, checked my baggage, had no more time left on my Indonesian Visa, etc., that I wouldn’t be given a boarding pass until I coughed up the 150K in local currency.  All I can say is: How. Fucking. Ghetto.  I had to truck to another terminal, arrivals section, to get the cash.  At this point, I could not WAIT to leave Indonesia.

And this isn’t even mentioning when my flight from Jakarta to Yogyakarta disappeared from the departure screen and I had no idea (along with the rest of the passengers) what was going on. Or how in Yogyakarta they had a SHITLOAD of Jakarta flights backed up, blocking everything else with WAY too many people crammed into a too-small waiting area.  Again, stop bragging about this being the 4^th largest country in the world!

At the end of the day, needless to say, I really can NOT recommend Indonesia – it’s kind of dirty, MORE than dirty in many places, the infrastructure is for shit, their tourism industry is woefully spotty and inefficient, and they have some “rules” and weirdnesses that make even CHINA seem relatively sane by comparison.  At most, if you really want to X it off your bucket list, I would suggest flying into Yogyakarta and seeing Borobudur just to say you did – and maybe checking out Prambanan, as well, while you’re there. Kind of a drag to have ended what was otherwise a fabulous 3-month globe-trotting adventure!

Final question from my year in China and sojourn through SE Asia: why do Asians hate carpet?

Postcard from Jakarta

Upon arrival in Indonesia, and on my way to my first hotel in Jakarta, I found myself suffering from “Rebecca Moore Syndrome” – named after my friend Bex who lived for a while in Japan before then moving to China.  The difference was, for her (understandably), jarring.  Ditto for me coming to Jakarta from Singapore.  To be fair, most cities would suffer in comparison to Singapore, but as I immediately bleated on Facebook upon my arrival, I found Jakarta more than a bit…er….”raw.”

“Fun” fact I did not know before – Jakarta is the second largest metropolis in the world (after Tokyo) at around 28 million.  I am always surprised to hear that Indonesia is the 4^th most populous country in the world, though I don’t know why I am surprised.  I guess I always expect Russia to have more people, due to its size – but then Stalin helped “control” their population.  As I was helpfully reminded by a talkative gentleman who followed me around the National Monument Park at the end of my stay, Indonesia is also the 3^rd largest democracy in the world. 

The traffic is obscene.  And I mean absurdly obscene – the fact that the second largest metropolis in the world is not currently being served by a Metro system certainly contributes to this (I think they are in the process of either planning/constructing one now – but they should have started it ages ago), but it makes the city even that much less of a pleasant place to visit.  But, honestly, I didn’t think I could be any more appalled by traffic after spending time in Shanghai, Hanoi, and Bangkok, but Jakarta puts them all to shame.  And my 4^th country in a row where they drive on the left.  It has now become so “natural” to me, I know I’m going to freak out next time I’m in a country where they drive on the right.

I spent the first two weeks in the north of the city, in an area called Mangga Dua.  If I had been more aware of just how large/spread out Jakarta is, and the lack of mass transit, I would have tried to get the second place I stayed in for my whole time – as it was, since I was out on the edge of the city, I spent my time catching up on my pictures, hanging out in the hotel gym and pool, watching movies, and reading.  I did take a couple of walks around the area, but it was just masses of traffic, with no sidewalks, ungodly hot, and, of course, smelly.  Even though it didn’t seem as polluted as GZ, by the time I returned to my room I just felt filthy.

Mangga Dua Square was nearby – yet another disconcertingly large Asian mall to get lost in.  J  This one was more like an open air market, yet enclosed.  There was quite a mix of booths/little shops – including many selling pirated DVDs, video games, etc.  Luckily, there was also a Carrefour, so I was able to save money by stocking up on groceries and cooking in the studio I was renting in the Mangga Dua Best Western I found on airbnb.

Although I wandered around/through Mangga Dua Square 3-4 times, I still ended up getting lost or turned around every single time.  It doesn’t help that there are THREE A&W’s in the mall, so that when I thought I’d gotten my bearings, I realized, no, I was in another section of the mall, on another floor, etc.  For whatever reason, there are tons of A&Ws in Jakarta.  Way more than McD’s or BK – come to think of it, I don’t recall seeing a single McD’s, but I did see a few BKs.  But, as I said, tons of A&Ws.  And of course KFCs.  I think KFC rivals McDs for the largest presence in Asia.  And, like A&W at Mangga Dua, you will often find multiple KFCs in a single mall throughout Asia.  Although, again, to be fair, the malls here are fucking huge!

When I ate at A&W, I ordered a bacon cheeseburger/curly fries combo, but noticed the bacon was more like a thin slice of spam, and wasn’t really too flavorful.  It wasn’t until a week later when I was debating on eating at BK when I saw their “Beefacon” Burger Combo and then the light came on – Duh! I’m in a Muslim country!  They don’t eat filthy pigs!  “Beefacon” is a perfect word, though, due to the “fake” sound in it!  Some places (e.g., Hard Rock), DID still serve bacon, however, to show that while Indonesia IS technically a Muslim country, they are certainly not “fundamentalist Middle East” about it.

Ramadan was in full swing while I was there, and the one down side to the second place I stayed (a large, nice apt. complex) was that it was adjacent to a Mosque that “helpfully” blared their prayers through VERY loud loudspeakers helpfully (again) perched well up the spires.  Up on the 18^th floor, I could hear the SEVERAL times a day caterwauling (sorry, I know I should be more “culturally sensitive” but I swear to god that’s what it sounded like) and I thought I was going to go insane, when on the night to mark the end of Ramadan, said caterwauling literally went on for over SIX HOURS STRAIGHT (until almost 2am) – punctuated by incessant firecrackers/lite fireworks from my neighbors and the neighboring mini-slum tucked in between the Mosque and the surrounding nice skyscraper apt. buildings.

And even though Indonesia is not necessarily “hard core” Muslim, they did have helpful “how to” videos in the elevator of how to arrange one’s hijab (head scarf).  And, like Singapore and Malaysia, said elevators had no 4^th, 13^th, or 14^th floors.  Ah, the challenges of a multi-culturally superstitious society! 

Speaking of slums, one day on my way back to my apt. after some wandering, I took a slightly wrong turn and faced the prospect of cutting through a large slum to get back, or backtracking a fair amount to wind my way around/through their byzantine street structure for the “right” way.  I went ahead and went for the “experience.” And my god was it one. First of all, it was good size, and definitely a slum. I was never worried, as my experience has taught me that, in general, poor people are nicer/more honest & trustworthy than rich people, but it was certainly sobering to see the poverty, the packed in living quarters, etc.  But, to be fair, while it was definitely “squalid” it wasn’t really dirty, per se, so much as just run down, old, etc.  I was too leery to take gawping pictures, as I thought that would be disrespectful/lame, but I did find a couple pics online that looked just like the place I had wandered through so folks could get a feel.

This second area I was in (after Mangga Dua) was the Surdiman area, in central Jakarta, and which borders the neighborhood (the name of which I have since forgotten) where Obama lived as a child, so of course, I scored the requisite pics of his second house and second school (where he went for 4^th grade). 

Central Jakarta is certainly much nicer, with more to do – although, at the end of the day, I didn’t really find a lot to do in Jakarta and would not highly recommend it.  At least until they get a Metro system.  There are some nice malls (again, huge), and I was able to get my latest Hard Rock Hurricane glass AND even eat at a Chili’s!  The first one I’ve ever seen outside the states.  They have THE best boneless buffalo chicken wings!  Also in one of the malls I even found a good Mexican restaurant, so on the whole I ended my time in Jakarta much more pleasantly than I began it—although all my outings had to be in the morning to beat the afternoon monsoons. Boy, did I see some rain!  Nothing like spending time in a sub-tropical area during rainy season!  It’s a trip!